I am a big ‘Little Me’.
I inhabit a large body,
a body of size, a body housing
a big Spirit and a minimal mind.
In my head I am a dancer, a diver,
an elegant, tall, thin Sally……
and then I giggle a smidging
at the very ‘notioned’ thought……
I laugh at myself as I pirouette
around and about, in and out
of all parts of me……………
Yet then I see this ageing self
in the glass upon the wall ….
a self where the years have
garnerd lines, rolls, width and curves
and I wonder:
“do I truly believe this is really me?
Who is ‘Me’? Where does the ‘I’
in me reside?” and inwardly I
toss my aching shoulders skyward!
All I know is this: my belief doesn’t
KNOW what I know about me……
skinny, vulnerable ‘Little Me’.
Life is a veritable smorgasbord of ‘WoW’s and ‘Ergh’s…..a feast of the good the bad and the downright ugly shmuggle. I Believe the ugly stuff is not ALL of our own making and …………..even if were, are we not >ALL< Human? We have been led to believe, things are as they they appear to be (I’m speaking of learned behaviours here )….. I Believe that many times they are absolutely NOT the way they appear!
I Believe much of what we are fed by politicians, society, family are illusions……. illusions which are making us ill, causing us to take our own lives, to kill or hurt other others with words and or actions……..
and I believe there are many wonderful things on the board too which help us avoid or heal from the damage of the bad…..
I Believe that sometimes we need a torch, tools and even a guide to help us avoid or get rid of the bad unhealthy stuff….. and then you see, we can enjoy the magnificence that was covered by those nasty things I shall label
I Believe, I/We/You can allow solace in our lives from knowing and not forgetting these things.
The word ‘Encourage’ has always meant to me to imbue with curage/courage…. it’s apparently a word which goes back to the 15th century…. we need it today more than ever, I would say. It implies instilling life; that is precisely how I experience it. Here is a little offering:
Encouragement is Life.
Give me break when
I tell you how I am!
I don’t need your lambasting
or your controlling words……
You want me to change?
Then put away that stick
and offer the carrot to
help me see in the dark.
When you encourage me
with your laughter and bright
smile, I come alive and want to LIVE.
Encouragement IS Life…..
and surely you should know,
a plant would never grow
if the sun scowled upon it!
Darkling day is creeping towards dusk.
My ageing feet, stiff with years and fallen tears
are cold….. cold like milk in glass bottles
left outside to stay fresh when mum had no fridge….
My feet were cold then but the open fire
I used like a mirror, sitting in front of it
till legs bright red, ached…. unforgivably.
Thoughts of a cold bed, closed door
and gut twisting shadows, would mangle in my head.
Then, in light of a frost laden morning,
curtains yanked back with ferocious frustration
and single glazed, iced over windows
blasted open, “for air”….
“come on, get up” richoceted in my ears
and placed my bare feet on cold, Marley tiled floors…….
Today’s cold floors are met with slippers,
when alone, no one barks except the cat for food…
and I light the fire, my lovely hearth, myself.
It’s all ok, for the mother in me
now understands better the mother in her…..
It takes time, all this and Time…..never ceases to move;